It’s been a little stressful around here lately … not necessarily at home but definitely in our larger community and even in our online community. I think we could all use something to laugh about. Here is my humble offering of jokes that may bring a smile to you today.
Why did the chicken cross the road . . .
Bob Dylan :How many roads must one chicken cross?
Jack Nicholson : ’cause it (censored) wanted to. That’s the (censored) reason.
Hamlet : Because ’tis better to suffer in the mind the slings and arrows of outrageous road maintenance than to take arms against a sea of on coming vehicles…
Martin Luther King, Jr. : I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question
The Bible : And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, “Thou shalt cross the road.” And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
Lord Baden-Powell : To earn a road crossing Badge.
Albert Einstein : Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your point of view. The chicken did not cross the road – it transcended it.
Dr. Seuss : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it, I’ve not been told!
Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.
Anderson Cooper: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.
BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of crossing the road.
Dr. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on ‘THIS’ side of the road before it goes after the problem on the ‘OTHER SIDE’ of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his ‘CURRENT’ problems before adding ‘NEW’ problems.
NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.